Joke of the Month

Difference of Life between Men and Women.
One of my friends shared these two pictures of the life difference between a man and a woman, quite real I am afraid. I think I better go home and spend more time to make my wife happy, Lol. Guys, don't you ever fail on your marriage, look at the picture below, scary isn't it?. If in trouble, just keep saying to your wife "Yes dear" or "honey I am sorry", it works every single time. I am in jail for 41 years and am still very happy, at least, meals are serviced, hahaha.

This below picture is the life of a woman, not fair but real. I believe I want to be a woman in my next life so I can buy so many shoes and bags and own a handyman at home for life. Don't you agree?

MIT, DMA, MBA
I went to a casino restaurant for dinner and two classy and beautiful ladies came over and asked me if I will buy them a drink plus like to know me better. So I told them I am a landscape architect from MIT and currently the president of DMA, and didn't get a MBA degree yet. So they were so excited until I explained these abbreviations, then they left like a jet. -- Mike Lin

MIT: Made In Taiwan.
DMA: Don't Mean Anything.
MBA: Married But Available.

3500738
Do you know the meaning of the following numbers:
To know the answer, click here.

What a perfect match.

Installing My Husband

A woman writes to the IT Technical support.....

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5,and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0,MONEY 3.0and CRICKET 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed,

_______ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ______
___ _______

REPLY

DEAR Madam,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: Ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0update.

If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5..

However, remember, overuse of the above application can causeHusband1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 or Beer 6.1.

Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT in any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software
to improve memory and performance. We recommend: Cooking 3.0and Good Looks 7.7.

Good Luck!

Artist
Recently a guy in Paris nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, , breaking in evading security, getting out and escaping with the goods, he was captured only two blocks away when his Econoline van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied:

"I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh."

Toothbrush

Husband says: When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?
Wife says: I clean the toilet...
Husband says: How does that help?
Wife says: I use your Toothbrush.....

A great tile patten for your new bathroom? Are you sure? Guess what else can be applied? click here.

Do you know that thing behind the lady can turn into something else? Guess first and click here.

If you draw very slowly, it will affect the progress of other important projects.
So you must draw quickly with good attitude. After all, you are only ruining on a piece of paper and not on your life, right?

If you made a mistake on your drawing, don't admit it (even on your make up). Sure you can fix it with tips of graphics we offer on this web site. Believe in yourself and foremost.